It’s pretty much an accepted fact that men mature at a slower rate than women. However, I think most people would agree that studies on this indicate social maturity is what psychologists are talking about in these studies.
But today, I want to talk about emotional maturity. Women get such a bad reputation for silent treatments and arguments when a lot of the time, it boils down to emotional maturity, usually on the side of the man.
Before I get too far into this, I want to make it clear that I don’t believe every man is emotionally immature. There are several amazing guys who were taught or learned emotional maturity. I know a lot of them. But I know and have experienced far more men with a lack of emotional maturity. I will be saying “men” as a general term in this post. Just know that I am aware that not all men are this way, but a lot are.
This post is for them and for women who feel the same.
THERE IS A REASON WOMEN ACT THE WAY WE DO
Why do we do this? Because we don’t understand how you don’t see what’s wrong. Men are not emotionally mature enough, for whatever reason, to read body language and cues from their female pattern, but they can tell when a friend is getting frustrated or another guy is about to swing on them. How does that make sense?
If a man says something is a rude tone and the woman gets quiet, doesn’t answer, or turns her attention away, how can a man sit there and ask “what’s wrong?”
Before I was married, I dated a guy who lived across the state line. He was obsessed with video games. I would drive hours to see him only to sit beside him while he played games. He would often ask “what’s wrong,” and I would tell him “I drive forever to see you just to sit here and watch you play games.”
Why did I need to tell him that? He should get that. Now, are there girls who will get mad for dumb reasons? Sure. Sometimes we see lack of concern for big things, so we get heated over the little things in hopes of stressing the importance of handling issues as they arise.
WHERE DOES EMOTIONAL IMMATURITY COME FROM?
It goes even further. Dads treat their sons much differently than their daughters. Dads view their daughters as princesses (most of the time) and will stop the world if they are hurt. But when boys are hurt, they are told the “toughen up.” This just perpetuates the expectation of the macho man.
Men are also expected to be emotionally tough. Men often don’t smile in pictures because it “makes them seem weak.” They don’t want to talk about their feelings. To all of these men, let me tell you something: your partners aren’t happy. Unless they are like you, they aren’t happy.
As a semi-influencer (a name I've given to myself since I don't have a huge following but have been blessed enough to work with some brands), I've had the opportunity to receive free products in exchange for a review.
While I always tell you my true feelings about the products or services I'm given, I'm not all that convinced that everyone does. Today, I want to share a few reasons why I think product/customer reviews aren't always reliable today.
1: MISINFORMATION FROM INFLUENCERS
I think a big reason why influencers do this, especially with a bigger brand, is because they don't want to have any bad blood, especially in the beauty industry. Then you have people like Jeffree Star who gives reviews on big makeup brands and shares his opinion, regardless of how it will reflect on the brand. Sadly, though, there aren't many reviewers like Jeffree who will slam Kylie Cosmetics to millions of followers (see below).
2: PEOPLE TRYING TO MAKE IT AS AN INFLUENCER
In today's world, everyone wants the dream job of being a YouTuber or blogger. Getting to do what you love (creating content) and getting paid for it is the dream. However, this can cloud some people's judgement and cause them to leave positive reviews in hopes of working with the brand later.
I want to stress that I wouldn't do this. If I try a product and it is awful, I will tell you! I wouldn't want to pay any money, let along $40-$60 for a product that didn't have good results. But, I do know some influencers who simply want to make good press for brands so they have a future with them! Brands don't want fake reviews, yet influencers do it. Go figure.
3: YOU CAN PAY PEOPLE TO REVIEW YOUR PRODUCT
My response is always "I don't feel comfortable writing a review about a product I haven't tried for myself." Luckily, freelance isn't my only job. But for someone who makes their living off of writing, they might not pass up the chance to make good money writing fake reviews.
And obviously, since the reviewer hasn't tried the product, there is no legitimacy in their review.
CONCLUSION AND QUESTION OF THE DAY
These are only a few of the reasons why the customer review is losing its power. I think more can be done if websites will add "verified purchaser" or indicate if someone was gifted a product to review. However, a lot of people won't stop to look at that. They want a quick answer and five positive reviews might be the answer they can get the easiest.
For the question of the day: how important are customer reviews to you? Given the information in this post, will you pay more attention to them next time you shop online?
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