As a member of a University staff, and as a graduate myself, I think that college is monumentally important. Not only is it important to help you earn a degree that can be used in a career, but it is also important to help you acclimate to living life on your own and to becoming a good citizen within a community.
But, there are undoubtedly things that I wish I had known before I enrolled! Since people are starting to get acceptance letters, I thought this would be a great post to make. If you want to learn more, keep reading:
1: YOU'LL PROBABLY HAVE A BREAKDOWN
According to the Association for University and College counseling Center directors, 95 percent of college counseling center directors say that psychological problems are a growing concern on their campus. This is why it is so important to never be too prideful or scared to seek out help. Most colleges either have a center for mental health services, or they have outside resources that can help you!
2: IT'S OK TO SAY NO
So, whenever I got in to college, I got really involved. I was in a number of clubs and organizations, including my sorority, and I was also really involved in my major. It took me until my senior year to realize that it is OK to say no. Remember that you are there to get your education. Not to plan social events, work on outside projects, etc.
3: COLLEGE FRIENDS WILL BE YOUR BFFS
I believe that this has to do with the fact that you are friends with these people during one of the most challenging moments of your life. On top of that, you finally understand when you graduate that you don’t have to talk to someone every single day to be their friend. All of my friends and myself have our own lives. But, we make a point to pick up where we left off when we see each other again!
4: PREPARE FOR DRAMA OF SOME SORT
She brought back guys and her cousin to our room most nights. When she came in, she would wake me up and be really noisy and turn the lights on.
Sometimes, your RA or RC won’t understand how bad the situation is. When this happened, my mom actually had to come down and confront my RC because she wasn’t doing anything about the situation. But, it all got handled and I didn’t have any more problems. After that, I moved in to my sorority house. Is it even a sorority house without drama? No.
5: YOUR PLANS MIGHT CHANGE, AND THAT’S OK
Your advisors and staff members around your college campus can help you decide what might be the best choice for you. You have time, and it isn’t a reason to panic.
6: MAKE A SCHEDULE AND STICK TO IT
This will help you make time for appointments, trips to the gym, homework and study time, time to call your family and update them on your day, and time with friends. This gives you a great work-home-friend-body-school balance!
I actually started writing a seventh tip only on work study, but I think that could be an entire post on its own. If you’re going to college, thinking about going back, or in your last years of study, I hope this can help you to improve your time in school!
HE EITHER SAID SOMETHING FUNNY OR WISE
HE LOVED ELVIS
HE WAS A PROUD VETERAN
HE WAS A CARING MAN
HE WAS A GIVING MAN
HE WAS A GODLY MAN
HE WAS A SUPPORTIVE MAN
Today's the day! Two years ago, I exchanged "I Do's" with the love of my life. It really has been a quick two years, but I feel like I've learned so much from them. So, in celebration of my two-year wedding anniversary, I wanted to share a few things I've learned. They aren't ground-breaking by any means!
I also want to show you how we celebrated this past weekend!
1. YOU'RE GOING TO FIGHT, AND THAT'S OK
Either way, arguing can actually build up your relationship. DO NOT go tell your partner I wanted you guys to get in a fight. No! Avoid it if you can. But if it leads to an improvement in your relationship, a few hours of talking and a few tears aren't bad!
2. YOUR MAMA DIDN'T RAISE YOUR PARTNER
3. GET A HOBBY TO STOP DRIVING EACH OTHER CRAZY
4. SUPPORT IS CRUCIAL FOR A HAPPY MARRIAGE
5. YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM CAN HURT YOUR PARTNER
6. BE BEST FRIENDS FIRST
HOW WE CELEBRATED
On Friday, I got off of work early. He didn't have to work. We went to Downtown Fayetteville, N.C. and visited Circa 1800 for lunch. He got a chicken sandwich topped with bacon and pulled pork, and I got a blackened chicken wrap! Afterward, we went next door to the new Caruso's Confections for a piece of three-layer chocolate mousse cake.
On Saturday, we had brunch at Metro Diner in Fayetteville, N.C. before heading up to Raleigh for an improv comedy show with ComedyWorks. We also visited our friend Lauren and her husband Aaron for a bit before heading home.
Since tonight is our official anniversary, we have a small chocolate cake to enjoy with one another!
I'm not going to lie. Between my personal and professional life, I've had a good bit of disappointments, especially in the last year.
However, I've learned that there ways to deal with that disappointment that will help preserve the relationships you have now and help you create new, meaningful relationships while in the midst of disappointment.
I do want to point out that I am not a therapist or a relationship counselor, but I do have the experience of being the giver and receiver of these things, and the following solutions really seem to help me in particular:
KEEP IT OFF SOCIAL MEDIA
Resist the urge to vent and complain about someone on your social media. Instead, try to reach out to a few trusted individuals in your life who you feel you can vent to. There are also a ton of free programs and chat rooms filled with anonymous strangers you can rant to. For me, I like to talk to my mom, husband, and really close friends about the stress in my life. It keeps me sane.
TAKE SOME TIME TO DECOMPRESS
Go to a movie, head to the park, or try a new hobby. Take yourself away from the disappointment to give yourself time to recover and to think on how you should go about addressing the problem.
MAKE A LIST/TRY TO SOLVE THE ISSUE
If it has to do with your disappointment in your personal life, take a moment to think about what you can do better. The sad truth is that we can't change anyone and we can't make them be something or someone they aren't. What we can change is how we react to disappointment.
I really hope that these tips on dealing with disappointment will help you down the line. I know that, for me, they have helped to save and repair relationships that would otherwise have no chance! Sometimes, you have to change your reaction.
If that person that is disappointing you continues, however, it can be a cycle of abuse that you need to go ahead and break and leave behind you.
When I was growing up, my mom and grandparents used to buy our house a gift. It was normally new pots and pans for the kitchen or a vacuum cleaner for the carpets. I decided this year to carry this tradition over and purchase our home an Amazon Echo Dot.
Ever since setting it up, I have purchased some items to go with it that have made my life so much easier! Keep reading to learn more about how the Echo Dot can improve your day-to-day life.
STRETCHING YOUR BRAIN
I now load up the machine with coffee grinds and water the night before. When I wake up, I simply say "Alexa, turn on the coffee machine." She turns it on for me and it can make itself while I get ready for the day. After that, I just have to add in my sugar and creamer and I'm on my way out the door!
PRO-TIP: You don't have to spend a ton of money on Amazon products. Check on Amazon to see if the plug, smartbulb, or smart TV is compatible with Alexa!
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*THIS POST IS NOT SPONSORED IN ANY WAY BY AMAZON!
DAY 1: MOVING BACKWARD IS NOT AN OPTION, AND STANDING STILL IS NOT ENOUGH
The first day of TED Talks featured Stacey Abrams, the first black woman in the history of the U.S. to be nominated for governor by a major party. Although Abrams lost the race, her TED Talk showed me that her loss didn’t kill her drive or spirit.
Her reasoning for wanting to become governor of Georgia was delivered through an anecdote, which I don’t want to spoil in case you decide to watch! She revealed that she lost the race for governor and was sad for a while, but she decided to keep pushing forward.
When she said “moving backward is not an option and standing still is not enough, I knew that was going to be what I took away from her talk. But how do you move forward after a loss? Abrams explained it was to ask yourself “what do I want, why do I want it, and how do I get it?”
They are simple questions. Going back to the why will fuel you to push for your how.
DAY 2: THE WORLD NEEDS TO EXPAND ITS RADIUS, BUT THAT IS MUCH EASIER SAID THAN DONE
Today's speaker was meteorologist J. Marshall Shepherd. He talks about the different biases that can effect the way we see the world.
Not unsurprisingly, Shepherd decided to focus most of his talk on the bias many people have on issues such as climate change. He explained that there are three types of biases that you may engage in when you come across dealing with an issue you have an inherent bias toward: confirmation bias (only finding evidence to support your existing belief), Dunning Kruger (believing you know more than you do about a topic), and cognitive dissonance (new info that contradicts our beliefs).
I for one believe that our climate is changing for the worse. However, there are plenty who believe differently. While I agree with Shepherd's premise, I found his speech wanting because he identified a serious problem without presenting a solution. In actuality, overcoming our biases, at least in America, will be next to impossible because we let it get so far before addressing the real problem.
Shepherd did say we should expand our radius, or knowledge, about science and other things. I also found this hard to digest because several things we used to observe as fact (like the age of the universe, medicines, and carbon dating) have since changed. We all need to think critically. That was my main take-away.
DAY 3: PROCRASTINATION EXISTS BEYOND DUE DATES
The speaker for this day is Tim Urban, a writer and illustrator for the website WaitButWhy.com.
Urban spent a lot of his time on the TED stage talking about his personal experience as a master procrastinator, reminiscing anecdotally on completing his 90-page thesis in 72 hours. He explained how the mind of the procrastinator works, saying that both the procrastinator and the non-procrastinator have decision makers, but the procrastinator has an "instant gratification monkey" who is all about fun and joy.
But Urban eventually got to a point where he talked about the dangers of procrastinating on things without deadlines. Things like relationships, pursing education, health, and others. We may seem like we have all the time in the world to meet these deadlines, but we don't, and they can catch up with us and ruin our lives.
I loved how Urban took a rather serious topic and put a funny spin on it!
DAY 4: LYING IS A COOPERATIVE ACT
Pamela Meyer, author of Liespotting, was today's speaker. Her book details a few was to spot a liar and teaches you how to protect yourself from that liar.
What I learned in this TED Talk was that lying is much more common than I thought, but we are much more to blame than I thought, as well. The signs of a liar are so telling that we are complicient in the lie. The fact that we can let someone get away with a lie is crazy!
I really did learn a lot about spotting lies and hope to change my position in the lie from a cooperative of it to a spotter of it. I think I might actually add Meyer's book to my Audible Wish List!
DAY 5: DON'T LET PAST REJECTION DICTATE FUTURE ASPIRATIONS
The speaker for today was Jia Jiang. He was a marketing executive for a Fortune 500 company and he started his own business when he was 30. He explains that he was long controlled by rejection he experienced as a child when no one in his class complemented him during a confidence-building exercise. He said that his childhood experience kept him from pursuing his dreams for fear of rejection.
Jiang decided to do a 100 days of rejection challenge where he decided to ask strangers for things that they would likely reject him for. His talk really taught me that the past is in the past and being rejected once doesn't mean I will always be rejected!
As I sat in the ballroom, my eyes heavy with sleep after waking up at 5 a.m. to ride almost two hours to a conference at High Point University in North Carolina, I wasn't expecting to learn much in the first hour or so.
Usually conferences like these start out with some mild life lessons many people have already learned, as well as a few announcements before we break off into small groups. I wasn't expecting to go to this conference to have myself challenged personally, but that's exactly what happened.
I have to say that I learned far more in that hour than I think I learned the entire day, which made it the best way to start my day. I want to share with you a few things that I learned, because they really sparked a change in me.
A FOOL SAYS, "I'LL DO MORE WHEN THEY PAY ME TO DO MORE"
CONFIDENCE COMES FROM COMPETENCE
There is truth to the saying "knowledge is power." When you know more, you can speak more confidently. You will have an air about you that will make people stop and wonder what got in to you. That's how I want people to look at me, and that is actually how many people want others to look at them.
SMALL STEPS MAKE BIG DIFFERENCES
NEVER SAY "I'M NOT CHANGING THE WORLD"
They have names of people and experiences lodged in their brains that helped them form in to who they have become. I bet you could ask anyone you know about their favorite teacher, and they could rattle off some touching and inspiring story on what their teacher said to them that changed their life.
You never know if you're communicating with the future president or some other person who will have great power and influence who can make that direct impact on the world. But it is your tutelage and your experience with them that may be a guiding force in making that decision.
Today's blog post is inspired by my two amazing rescue animals: my cat Rum Tum and my dog Maisel.
1. BE PREPARED TO CLEAN
2. DON'T SPEND MONEY ON THINGS YOU CAN DIY
3. YOUR PETS MAY NOT GET ALONG RIGHT AWAY
We've decided to give Maisel the house during the day and give Rum Tum the house at night. We also are slowly acclimating them to one another by letting them out at the same time under very watchful eyes. I think it is going pretty well. I really hope they will be best friends one day!
4. SCHEDULE A CHECK-UP RIGHT AWAY
We had to take her to a vet to get some medicine, and the vet did an exam on her. PetSmart and other clinics may offer a special general exam for your new animal. Have them checked out, especially if they will come in contact with other animals. Don't trust the shelter to have kept them up-to-date on everything.
5. PETS TAKE ENERGY
6. TRY TO STAY AWAY FROM CHICKEN PRODUCTS
7. GET TOYS THAT REPLACE THEIR BAD HABITS
Above everything else, be sure to love your adopted pets. Odds are, they were on the street or were surrendered by someone they really loved. They need the love and joy that comes with a new family!
I'm always down to save money when I have the chance. That's why I've started to do some things that help to save without majorly interrupting my life. I wanted to share these with my readers in hopes that they help you!
DON'T THROW OUT THAT COFFEE
However, if you just pour unused coffee down the sink, you're just wasting money! Instead, I've started to pour my excess coffee into a pitcher and refrigerate it. When I get home, I have cold coffee waiting. I can simply add in my cream, sugar, and some ice for iced coffee that will help me get through my writing assignments and blog posts!
SIGN UP FOR SAVINGS PROGRAMS WITH YOUR BANK
PICK UP YOUR GROCERIES
This service was first introduced to me by my mom. It is great for moms with children who may not be easy to handle in the store, for people with busy lives, and for disabled people. All you do is order online, reserve a pickup time, and arrive. The employees will load your cart up for you. Sometimes, they may not have exactly what you asked for, but they always give you fair substitutions.
This service is free and is a great way to stick to your list without making impulse buys!
FOLLOW MY WATER RULE
I also don't drink my morning coffee until I've had at least one 26 fl oz glass of water. This helps me to save money because I'm not drinking a ton of coffee or soda. It also helps keep my hydrated and focused throughout the day!
DONATE TO A THRIFT STORE
HAVE A FREE DATE NIGHT
There are so many other things you can do to save money and to live your best life, but these are ones that I've tried and will probably continue to do unless I become a millionaire! Do you have any money-saving tips? Let me know below!