Disclaimer: I am sad and that is the dominate emotion I am struggling with. I am not suicidal. However, this is a pretty heavy
post, so if you are struggling with that, this may not be the best post for you to read. If you or someone you know is struggling
with these thoughts, please phone the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.
A few weeks ago, my nana passed away unexpectedly. I was close to her all my life, but she became reclusive as she got older. She also had dementia and could be combative about doing what was best for her health at times.
I’m guessing this is where my stuck and depressed feelings are coming from. That alongside anxiety I have for addressing anything that ever goes wrong in our rental with my landlord.
Those who don’t have a creative or physical outlet take comfort in talking to people. But I can’t seem to allow myself to do that, either. The people I love who will read this might get upset at me for saying that, because they’ve never given me a reason to feel like they wouldn’t be there for me.
I have no doubt in my mind that God has blessed me and my family, even though we’ve had a horrible experience in the last few weeks with losing someone unexpectedly. People have shown kindness and love, and family bonds have been strengthened. And because all of that, I have this overwhelming hate for my current depressive state and the fact that my brain can’t seem to sit that feeling aside for more positive thinking.
So, if you got this far, thank you for reading and hearing me out. Writing truly is a source of joy and maybe even therapy for me. Plus, I always ask myself if sharing my thoughts and feelings could benefit someone. I know I’m not alone in this feeling, but I would love to know if you have ever felt this way and what may have worked best for you when you were in this place.
I got a call from my mom last night telling me to head to the gas station to fill up my car. Why? Because the United States had been hit with a ransomware attack and a hacking group was holding access to the Colonial Pipeline hostage until they receive a payment from the government.
According to the hacking group, their goal is to get money from this attack, not disrupt society. However, they underestimated just how involved gas is in our nation and in the eastern United States.
Our economy largely depends on gas for the transportation of goods to stores. Goods like groceries, medication, and clothing, not to mention our precious Amazon packages. This cyberattack certainly has and will disrupt our society, as the Colonial Pipeline fuels much of the eastern U.S.
But what can we do to make our gas last? Let me offer up a few tips in today's short blog post.
If people continue to hoard the gas, it is very possible that limits and restrictions will be placed on how much gas each person can use.
5. Cut down on car idling time: I don't know about you, but sometimes I tend to let my car idle while I'm listening to the rest of an awesome song, on the phone with my mom after a long day of work, or when I'm eating my lunch in my car. According to the South Carolina Department of Health and Environmental Control, Idling uses up to half a gallon of fuel per hour! Idling even for a few minutes can cost a pretty penny down the line!
âIâve always been told that a happy life is a balanced life, meaning that giving the proper time to family, work, hobbies, and self is imperative if you want a life worth living.
For me, though, that was much easier said than done. After graduating college, I drenched myself in cynicism. In fact, I would go so far as to say that I became a rather negative person. This, of course, resulted in several people in my life telling me to âjust be positive.â
My response was always the same: âThe situation isnât positive, so Iâm not going to force myself to make it positive.â
âI was filling myself with anxiety and, as a result, stress over situations that didnât even exist. But after I visited the ER for what I thought was something serious only to find out it was nothing, I began to change my tune.
I was feeling anxious, for sure, but also sick. I felt like I had no energy, and my arm was hurting. I was freaking out. All my life, Iâve been told that I am high risk for things because Iâm fat. Heart attacks, strokes, etc. Plus, my mom has a stroke history. So, it scared me enough to make me go to the ER, despite an âall clearâ from an urgent care facility.
âIt was then that I decided that I needed to find the balance. I needed to be positive about the things I didnât have enough information about. I needed to work on my work-life balance and leaving the stress of the job in the office instead of taking it home with me. I needed to stop worrying so much about offending people when I disagreed with them and just say what I wanted to say kindly and professionally. I had to realize that not everyone will like me, and I shouldnât let someoneâs dislike of me control my life and cause me stress.
TIPS FOR MANAGING STRESS
1. GET INVOLVED: I know that might sound counter-intuitive, but getting involved in a hobby or organization that brings you joy or purpose can really help ease everyday stress.
2. WRITE IT/SAY IT: I got into the habit of taking videos of myself venting, or writing out what makes me stressed or angry. This really helped me think through my stress and realize where my mind was taking me.
3. LEARN TO TURN OFF: If you have a job and you didn't agree to be available 24/7, unplug from that job after the work day. Leave the stress of your job at your desk and enjoy your time off.
4. DON'T JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS: This one is hard for me and something I still struggle with. It is easy for someone like me to get a headache and immediately think I have something really wrong with me. If something is worrying you, go to the doctor or think up more reasonable reasons why you feel sick. If it is still worrying you, go get checked out. If you're unsure of something someone said, ask them about it. Don't make up scenarios in your head and add stress unnecessarily.
5. DO SOMETHING FOR YOU: We each spend a lot of our time doing things for other people. Working extra hard at our job, taking care of children or pets, serving in organizations. But we sometimes don't do anything for ourselves. No matter if it is deciding to get a mani/pedi every two weeks, buy yourself a new outfit, or hire a babysitter so you can get out of the house. Do it. Give yourself time to decompress and get away from your stressors.
I've found that many women, like me, are hesitant to share their accomplishments. They feel like, when they share these great things about themselves, they're being egotistical. I find myself feeling that way when I share about something great in my life, so I often keep it quiet.
But not today! Today, I want to brag on myself. But first, I want to acknowledge that I give glory to God and thanks to my family for all that I've accomplished. I couldn't have done it all on my own, and I'm thankful for my support system.
MILLENNIAL ADVISORY COMMISSION MEMBER
GREEK WITH THE HIGHEST GPA
I'M JUST REALLY GOOD AT MY JOB
I get it. People don't like talking about it. But I'm really good at my job. I get my work done, and I make sure it is the best content it can possibly be. I love the people I meet, the experiences I've had, and the things I've made. I'm great at what I do, and I'm going to say it. I was recently approached about judging some marketing projects for a doctoral program. I was the only one on the panel without a doctorate or master's degree. People care about what I think, and that makes me feel good about myself! I am so happy to help people in whatever ways I can. It make me feel needed and valued.
I grew up in North Carolina, and only about an hour away from Greensboro, but there are things there that I did this past weekend that I've never experienced. It all started with a trip to the Greensboro Science Center.
GREENSBORO SCIENCE CENTER - $16/Ticket (Adult)
My favorite animals at the zoo/science center was the green snake (second pictured) as well as a guinea pig that looked a lot like my mom's corgi puppy Newton. There was an attraction there called the Sky Walk where you can do a sort of ropes course. It would be perfect for kids and adventurous adults.
Lastly, there was a museum area, which was really cool and featured a giant pendulum that knocked down pieces of metal throughout the day, as well as a merry-go-round (which we didn't do).
LUCHA LIBRE ICE CREAM
1. ZORA NEALE HURSTON
After learning more about her, I find myself connected to Hurston. She would walk into a room of strangers, make them feel comfortable by talking and sharing stories, and walk away with new friends. This is a trait I try to possess. One of her friends even said she has the "gift of walking into hearts," thanks to her infectious humor and fiery intellect.
2. EARTHA KITT
If you ask me, no person should be penalized for speaking out against what they don't agree with. Eartha Kitt will always be inspirational to me for her quick witt and opinionated outspokenness.
He had a huge respect for women, and spoke directly to the worth and dignity of black women who are so often smashed down by media and society. He was always described as a person flowing with charisma, and we all know that he spoke truth. I admire that about him, and the fact that he had such a big heart, despite others in the rap game back then who hurt others physically, others including Tupac himself (probably, but that's unconfirmed).
4. RUBY BRIDGES
1. HE'S PRETTY CUTE
2. HE LOVES THE LORD
3. HE MAKES ME LAUGH
4. HE HAS A KIND HEART
5. HIS PASSION FOR WHAT HE LOVES
6. HE SPEAKS MY LOVE LANGUAGE
7. HE SURPRISES ME
8. HE IS GIVING
9. HIS BIG BROWN EYES
10. HOW HE DOES THINGS I WANT TO DO THAT HE DOESN'T LIKE, SOMETIMES
11. HE NEVER MAKES ME DOUBT
12. HE HELPS ME WHEN I'M ANXIOUS
13. HE'S VERY KISSABLE!
14. HE WILL BE A GREAT FATHER ONE DAY
If you're behind on your Valentine's Day shopping, you can still get something for the person you love from my RedBubble store. This store contains the following designs, which you can order on various products from stickers, to shirts, to greeting cards, and beyond!
LOVE WITHOUT LIMITS
LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED
YOU ARE MY WORLD
BROKEN HEARTS CLUB
HIT ME, CUPID CONVERSATION HEART
I LOVE MUSIC
I once had a friend who didn't like celebrating Valentine's Day. It wasn't because she was single; she had a significant other. The issue she had with the day was that your significant other should always show you the same amount of love every day, and shouldn't wait until V-Day to shower you with love.
While I agree to some extent, I still think the day is special and should be celebrated! Check out why in today's blog post.
LIFE GETS REALLY BUSY!
Spend Valentine's Day with your significant other, or even yourself. We don't always do enough self-care, or spend enough time with our partners. This day is the perfect day to celebrate one another.
IT'S A DAY FOR CHOCOLATE!
YOUR PARTNER DESERVES A SPECIAL DAY!
I may not be single now, but I was single for my entire adult life. I never went on a date until I was in college! With that being said, I know what it's like to see a bunch of happy couples all around you with no one to celebrate with. So, I wanted to give you some ideas on how you can celebrate this Day of Love if you don't have a romantic partner.
TAKE YOURSELF ON A DATE
HAVE A SELF-CARE DAY
HAVE A FRIEND DATE
VOLUNTEER AND MAKE SOMEONE SMILE